How to Negotiate Like Trump, Rule 1

During the first 100 days of Trump's presidency, we have heard a lot about Trump's negotiation skills. As the Author of How to Negotiate Like a Pro; 41 Rules for Resolving Disputes, I decided to review my own rules in the age of Trump.

Mary's Rule 1:  Focus on the Goal. Don't be Distracted by Your Emotions.

Trump's Rule 1:  Focus on Your Emotions. Don't be Distracted by Your Goals

When I wrote How to Negotiate Like a Pro, I said it is important to check your emotions at the door before trying to negotiate because emotions such as anger can make one lose control. We have all seen someone who gets red in the face and starts shaking his finger and generally looks as though he could easily have a heart attack. Sometimes that person is so angry that he is incoherent. Now many years after writing that, I realize that person could be Donald Trump. 

If I am dealing with someone who is very emotional and upset, how do I handle it?

If the other side is baiting me, I remain calm and do not give any indication that the insults or bullying have any affect on me.  I try to keep a poker face. If I do start getting upset, I ask for a break  and try to compose myself and take a few deep breaths before coming back to the negotiating table. I tell myself that it does not matter whether I like the other side or not. My goal is to resolve the problem. 

Script:

I am going to pretend I did not hear that comment and move right along, but consider this a warning that such comments will not be tolerated in the future.

Mary Greenwood, Negotiator, Mediator, Arbitrator, Attorney and Author of How To Negotiate LIke A Pro: 41 Rules for Resolving Disputes, Winner of ten book awards; How to Mediate Like a Pro: 42 Rules for Mediating Disputes, Winner of 11 book awards; and How to Interview Like a Pro, 43 Rules for Getting Your Next Job, Winner of 12 book awards. Email: mgreen464@aol.com, Visit www.marygreenwood.org